Welcome to the Punch (2013)

welcome to the punch

Welcome to the Punch is a crime thriller about a former criminal who returns to London to help his son, who took part in a heist gone wrong. Because said criminal is now back in London, it give a detective another shot at taking him down.

The criminal, Jacob Sternwood, is elite. He was always one step ahead, and he got out before the ife took him down. He moved away to Iceland, where he lives a relatively quiet life with the money he made from his illicit activities.

The detective, Max Lewinsky, who is probably Monica’s long lost brother, has always wanted to take down Sternwood. He knows just how good, and how dangerous, Sternwood really is.

But not all is as it seems, and these two longtime adversaries start to realize they’re in deep in a game neither of them truly understands. The two must find a way to work together to uncover a mystery that’s more important than anything either of them has either done.

And fall in love in the process.

Just kidding, but how awesome would it be if this was really a romantic comedy between two dudes? I’d pay to see that.

Not that I want to see two dudes make out. That’s like, gross, man. I’m totally too butch for that. I like the ladies. Vagina all the way. I was just saying I thought it’d be funny.

NEVER MIND. I don’t want to see a gay rom com at all.

Welcome to the Punch

Welcome to the Punch comes from writer/director Eran Creevy, who was likely bullied in school when the other kids called him “Eww… Creepy.” At least I’m guessing. Creevy has some assistant directing credits to his name, and he wrote/directed a film called Shifty a few years back that was nominated for a BAFTA. Not sure if it was good, but hey, it was nominated for an award so it HAS to be pretty decent, right?


Welcome to the Punch Trailer

Welcome to the Punch Release Date

March 15, 2013.

Who’s In It?

 James McAvoy … Max Lewinsky
  David Morrissey
  Mark Strong … Jacob Sternwood
  Peter Mullan
  Andrea Riseborough … Sarah Hawks
  Daniel Mays
  Johnny Harris … Dean Warns
  Steve Oram … Journalist
  Daniel Kaluuya … Juka
  Elyes Gabel … Ruan Sternwood
  Robert Portal … Robert Wiseman
  Ellie Darcey-Alden … Girl
  Jason Maza … Luke
  Lee Nicholas Harris … Paramedic
  Dannielle Brent … Karen Edwards
  Cathy Murphy … Nurse Fiol
  Chonradee Kulthap … Cleaner
  Matthew David McCarthy … Doctor
  Alastair Cumming … Spin Doctor
  Ray De-Haan … The Wrong Man
  Ginny Dee … Hospital Visitor

What’s Good About It?

Welcome to the Punch has a great cast, with James McAvoy and Mark Strong the leads. The trailer looks good and the concept seems decent.

What’s Bad About It?

So far my only concern is the experience and talent of Creevy, but that doesn’t mean the film will suck balls or anything.

Our Clever Prediction

I don’t think Welcome to the Punch will be a massive hit, but I do think there’s a good chance it’ll make decent enough money for what seems like a lower budget British crime thriller. There is a chance that Creevy could turn into a new Guy Ritchie, so in ten to fifteen years he’ll be re-imagining classic literary characters into bland action heroes. SWEET.