This Means War (2012)


This Means War is a romantic comedy action movie about two highly trained spies who are best friends and fall in love with the same woman. In an effort to win the girl and one-up each other they pull all sorts of pranks and hijinks and hopefully hilarity will ensue.

Chris Pine and Tom Hardy are best friends. They’ve worked together to bring down entire governments as CIA operatives. They’re the best. They have access to high tech weaponry, satellites, other cool stuff, and they use it to kick some serious butt. But now that they’ve met Reese Witherspoon, they’re going to have to take each other on, and they’re going to prove to be the toughest enemies either has faced.

Wait. Reese Witherspoon is the girl? Ryan Phillipe’s sloppy seconds? Never mind. This movie looks stupid.

This Means War

Remember how I said this movie looks stupid? (it was just a second ago. Unless you’re Canadian you should be able to remember at LEAST that much.) Well, This Means War is especially stupid because it’s being directed by McG. Yeah, the Charlie’s Angels and last Terminator McG.

I like how I imply that there could be another McG. As if someone else would be lame enough to take a name like that. Anyways, this movie is going to make your vision cloudy for a few days afterward if you see it. Cause you’ll have shit in your eyes.

This Means War Trailer

This Means War Release Date

February 14, 2012.


Who’s In It?

 Tom Hardy,  Chris Pine, Reese Witherspoon ,  Rebel Wilson,  Laura Vandervoort

What’s Good About It?

I really like Tom Hardy and Chris Pine, and the concept sounds like fun.

What’s Bad About It?

This Means War is essentially a declaration of war against intelligence and good filmmaking. It’s being made by McG, and the object of desire for two young, good looking dudes is Reese Witherspoon. It isn’t 1998 anymore.

Our Clever Prediction

I don’t know. Witherspoon doesn’t have much box office power these days, Tom Hardy hasn’t quite proven himself to the masses yet, and Chris Pine still has a ways to go yet as well. The trailer for This Means War did look okay though.