Red Riding Hood (2011)

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Red Riding Hood is Catherine Hardwicke’s follow up to the first Twilight film. It tells the tale of Little Red Riding Hood, only she’s a teenager who is in love with a werewolf. Really, Hardwicke? Is this all you’ve got?

Before all you little girls go buy tickets for this crap, remember that Twilight is ruining America.

Anyways, Red Riding Hood is set in the Middle Ages, with a young woman trying to uncover the identity of a wolf that is terrorizing her village. She’s also engaged to the rich kid and town, while being wooed by the town bad boy, who I bet is the werewolf.
This new Red Riding Hood Movie is being directed by Catherine Hardwicke, who made a pretty crappy movie last time out, so I’m not exactly hopeful. The only interesting thing about the film to me is that Leonardo DiCaprio is producing. Way to start big, dumbass. All that Oscar love must have gone to his head. No, don’t produce something worthwhile, just cash in. You have been demoted, sir. DEMOTED. (can you smell the sarcasm here?)

Red Riding Hood Trailer


Pictures

Movie Release Date

Red Riding Hood comes to theaters March 11, 2011.

Who’s In It?

Gary Oldman … Father Soloman
Amanda Seyfried … Valerie
Lukas Haas … Father August
Virginia Madsen … Suzette
Billy Burke … Cesaire
Julie Christie … Red’s Grandmother

Interesting Fact

In the original tale, Little Red Riding Hood and her grandmother are eaten alive, and then a hunter comes and cuts open the wolf’s stomach, from which the two women emerge unharmed. That’s what you get for not chewing your food!

And why does he talk about his big teeth if he swallows them whole?

What’s Good About It?

I’m struggling here. Uh… maybe the wolf/bad boy in town will be cut open?

What’s Bad About It?

From start to finish, this is crap. Watch the trailer. Most of the shots look like they’re almost cool, because Hardwicke doesn’t have the talent of Darren Aronfsky or Gore Verbinski 

Our Clever Prediction

I hope it bombs, but I expect big things. I doubt the budget is very high, and it just screams, “I’m a stupid little girl and will see this for infinity!” Still, I have a feeling they promote this to a pretty young audience , the same one that falls for the whole vampire craze. Or, is it ‘Vampyre’? This new Red Riding Hood movie may just surprise us all, and destroy at the box office.

10 COMMENTS

  1. I for one can’t wait to see this movie!!! “Brian” can go back to sucking lemons. Gosh! What a prune!! Speaking your mind is one thing, but before you’ve even seen the movie??? Really?? What’s wrong with the world is simple minded people who can’t give anyone or anything a chance!

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