New pics from The Hobbit, Resident Evil: Retribution and Pacific Rim, a poster for Oz the Great and Powerful, concept art from Iron Man 3 and an AMERICAN trailer for Jack Reacher!
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey comes out this December, and it will be on the cover of the next Entertainment Weekly. No doubt there will be fascinating (meaning: dull) tidbits from the set about the production and what we can expect to see. I’m thinking we’ll see a hobbit, a wizard, dwarves, a precious and some other crap.
Resident Evil: Retribution
Like many of you, I have a plan for the zombie apocalypse. Step one: DON’T KICK A ZOMBIE IN THE FACE. THEY BITE YOUR FOOT AND THEN YOU’RE A ZOMBIE.
Step two: head North to Canada. Even zombies can’t stand the stink of Canadian armpit breath.
In this Resident Evil: Retribution picture we see Milla Jovovich’s Alice in a pose where she’s about to kick a zombie in the throat. I’ll let it pass through, because she has buckles on her legs, and that shit is hottttt.
I only recently got into Sons of Anarchy, and it is the Shit. A big part of that is Charlie Hunnam playing Jacks. He is really really really good, and he makes me want to see Pacific Rim.
Also, director Guillermo del Toro, Idris Elba and IT’S ABOUT BIG ROBOTS FIGHTING ALIENS.
It’s like God asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and instead of my first choice, Milla Jovovich with buckles, he gave me Pacific Rim. Not a bad consolation prize.
Oz the Great and Powerful
In Oz the Great and Powerful, a small time magician named Oscar is transported to the Land of Oz, where presumably he becomes the great and powerful Oz. I assume. Well, there’s still a tornado involved, but this time the mode of transportation is not a farm house, but rather a hot air balloon. This is why I never trust balloons.
Fun fact: hot air balloons are the core of the Canadian Air Force. Their Navy is a combination of canoes and waiting for the water to freeze so they can out-hockey the other army.
Iron Man 3
I think this Iron Man 3 concept art showcases the likely plot line of the third film, which is the Extremis armor/virus. At least it appears to me that Tony Stark is transitioning into the Iron Man armor with his mind.
That’s sorta what the Extremis virus does. He uses it in the comics to bond more fully with the armor, and the nanites in his blood allow him to put on the armor with his brains.
This Jack Reacher trailer is much better than the international one from the other day. Why? Because it’s in AMERICAN. Not English.
AMERICAN. I understood it, and Tom Cruise is back.
Or at least he appears to be in this two minute trailer.