Even the Rain (2011)

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Remember how Christopher Columbus discovered America? Turns out there’s more to the tale…

He also claimed Canada for Spain, but they returned it.

It took me a minute (just one) to figure out what the hell was going on with this movie. The official synopsis is that it’s about Columbus, but then I saw the poster, and the dudes had zippers on their jackets, and there’s a helicopter. Everyone knows that Columbus’s helicopter ran out of gas and they had to drop it into the ocean off the back of his boat, the Titanic.

So the film is really about a film crew that goes to Bolivia in the midst of a war to shoot a film about Columbus, and the lines of history are blurred, as parts of the film tell the story of Columbus conquering the Native Americans, which is compared/contrasted with the present conflict in Bolivia. The film crew picks Bolivia because the locals will work as extras for just two dollars a day. So it’s like they’re subjugating the locals like Columbus. I got it now.

The Scoop

The director is Icíar Bollaín, and if you know her or her work, congratulations, cause I don’t. Perhaps you saw Mataharis, which is like a Spanish version of Wall Street (doubtful).

To clarify, the doubt in the last sentence is not only that you’ve seen the film, but also that it is anything like Wall Street. Clearly, the film follows Wall Street 2 far more closely, what with the Latino Shia Lebouf in the lead. Also a lie.

Trailer

Nope, although if you search in Youtube for a Even in the Rain trailer, the first thing to come up is a trailer for Twilight: New Moon.

Who’s It For?

No rating, but this film just screams XXX.

Pictures

Fine. Here.

Movie Release Date

TBA February 2011.

Who’s In It?

Gael García Bernal … Sebastián
Najwa Nimri … Isabel La Católica
Luis Tosar … Costa
Karra Elejalde

Related Movies

Apocalypto, The New World, The Matarese Falcon (think about it)

What’s Good About It?

The film is Spain’s official Oscar Entry, so they clearly have placed all their hopes on the film. Kinda like Thomas the Train Engine. That little guy sure gave it his all. *sniff* He really did.

What’s Bad About It?

I thought Bolivia was in Africa.

Our Clever Prediction

It really seems like Oscar bait. This might do it though. Obviously it won’t make much money even if it does win, but I think it has a very good shot.

On a side note, the only land Canada ever tried to colonize was an Arby’s. Cause you’re fat and stupid. Cause their food sucks.

WAIT! I meant Caribou Coffee. Cause they REALLY SUCK and you’d have to a complete moron to want to conquer one. Oh, and I said TRIED to colonize. Canada couldn’t even colonize a restaurant/cafe. Losers.