Texas Killing Fields is a crime detective thriller starring Sam Worthington and Jeffrey Dean Morgan as homicide detectives tracking a killer who dumps his victims in Texas marshes known as “The Killing Fields.”

How menacing a name is “The Killing Fields” for a bunch of marshes? Why not “The Marshmallow Marshes?” Then you’d only get the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man showing up to play. WAY better than killers.

Anywho, there are two detectives on this case, one of them a local boy, the other a transplanted New York detective. The big city detective warns the local boy that the murders are outside of their jurisdiction, but he still pursues the murderer. When the murderer discovers that he’s being hunted, he turns the hunt around on the detectives and starts taunting them, and kidnaps a girl. They then must race against time to save her and bring this dastardly villain to justice.

I say ‘dastardly’ because I assume it’s Elmer Fudd.

The Texas Killing Fields

Ami Canaan Mann is directing, and he doesn’t have a lot of experience, but he was the second unit director on Heat, so he’s got to be pretty good. Right?

Oh, and the film is based on a true story, so that’s cool.

Texas Killing Fields Trailer

The Texas Killing Fields Release Date

October 7, 2011.

Pictures

Who’s In It?

 Jessica Chastain
  Chloe Moretz … Little Anne Sliger
  Sam Worthington … Jake Souder
  Jeffrey Dean Morgan
  Stephen Graham … Rhino
  Annabeth Gish … Gwen Heigh
  Sheryl Lee
  Jason Clarke … Rule
  Leanne Cochran … Lila
  Sean Michael Cunningham … Sean Heigh
  Becky Fly … Neighbor
  James Hébert … Eugene Sliger
  Donna Duplantier … Reba
  Marcus Lyle Brown … CSI
  Lyle Brocato … Jim
  Kirk Bovill … Boyfriend
  Tom Proctor … Poacher #2
  Deneen Tyler … Lady Worm
  Tony Bentley … Capt. Bender
  Elise Fyke … Victim
  Samantha Beaulieu … Sheila
  Mark Adam … Mike

What’s Good About It?

I actually like the cast, even with Worthington, who tends to lack the charisma that’s associated with him. The story looks decent, and it’s being produced by Michael Mann, which is almost always good. I’m looking forward to this one.

What’s Bad About It?

It might be a bit by the numbers. I’d prefer The Texas Killing Fields to be based on a story that someone just made up. Real life is this crap we have to live. I WANT AVATAR!

Or something else equally stupid and ridiculous.

Our Clever Prediction

I doubt the Texas Killing Fields will make much money, but it all depends on the quality of the film. It’s not like Transformers, where you can just put any shit on screen and it’ll print money.

New trailers for Green Lantern and Transformers, a poster for Friends with Benefits, and holy crap the coolest thing ever, we have a picture of Tom Hardy as Bane in The Dark Knight Rises!!!!!

Green Lantern

I just saw Pirates of the Caribbean, and this wasn’t in front of it, so I don’t know what this 3D trailer is for. Regardless, I give it to you. Oh, and it’s easily the best trailer for Green Lantern yet.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Transformers: Dark of the Moon has a new trailer. I honestly can’t even tell that it’s different. It all just blends into a world of stupid for me.

Friends with Benefits

Argh. Here’s a Friends with Benefits poster. At least Mila Kunis looks hot.

The Dark Knight Rises

Tom Hardy is going to be a badass Bane. The Dark Knight Rises is going to also be badass. I’m looking forward to it.

The Ledge is a thriller about a man standing on a (dun dun duh) ledge who says he has to jump at noon or someone he loves will die.

Do you hate Christians? The writers of this film do. Essentially, a faithful fundamentalist Christian father hates his wife’s lover, and he forces the man to stand on a ledge, and jump, or he’ll kill his wife, who I guess the lover really loves.

Personally, I just MAKE love to them, but I never let my heart enter into the equation. They might end up hurt, but I’m cool as ice, baby.

The Ledge

Matthew Chapman wrote and directed The Ledge. He doesn’t have much directing experience, but he wrote The Runaway Jury and What’s the Worst That Could Happen?, so I guess he’s okay. And by “okay” I mean that What’s the Worst That Could Happen? Was surprisingly good for a movie starring Martin Lawrence.

The Ledge Trailer

The Ledge Release Date

June 29, 2011.

Pictures

Who’s In It?

  Charlie Hunnam … Gavin
  Patrick Wilson … Joe
  Liv Tyler … Shauna
  Terrence Howard … Hollis
  Christopher Gorham
  Jaqueline Fleming … Angela
  Monica Acosta … Housekeeper
  Mike Pniewski … Lt. Markowitz
  Jillian Batherson … Harper
  Katia Gomez … Selena
  Mindy Caraccioli … Hotel Clerk
  Dean J. West … Frank
  Amber Gaiennie … News Anchor
  Melody Noel … Girl with dog
  Sean Paul Braud … Cop
  Jason Johnson … Police Officer
  Thomas C. Daniel … Cop
  Don Lincoln … Man on Street
  Geraldine Singer … Doctor
  Gracie McCauley … 5 year old girl
  Nathan Alan Thomas … Camera man
  Alyssa Tate … Young Girl
  Cindy Williamson … Downtown bystander
  Michele Van … Young Girls Mother
  Maverick Boudreaux … Cameraman

What’s Good About It?

The concept would be pretty good if it wasn’t for the fundamentalist Christian thing. It feels completely unnecessary to the story. Men who aren’t religious also get pissed when their wives cheat on them.

What’s Bad About It?

The Christian angle bugs me. It feels like a cheap shot.

Our Clever Prediction

Limited release. No doubt the film will make little money. Oh well, another flop for Terrence Howard.

Funny trailer for 30 Minutes or Less, a new Green Lantern TV Spot, casting for Savages and Ted, the new Jason Bourne, and because Transformers doesn’t have enough posters, I give you yet another.

30 Minutes or Less

30 Minutes or Less, starring Jesse Eisenberg and Aziz Ansari, has a trailer, and it looks kinda funny. Mostly the concept seems good, although that doesn’t mean the writing is all that great. It’s a red band trailer, and yet there’s relatively little in the way of swearing. Sure, there are a few lines, but it isn’t all that dirty. Unlike your momma. She is real dirty. Like, stanky ho dirty.

Green Lantern

Green Lantern is still going to suck. This TV spot, while moderately pretty at moments, does NOTHING to lessen my fears. SUCK. SUCK. SUCK. That’s what this film is going to do.

Savages

Oliver Stone’s Savages is said to be about to add John Travolta and Uma Thurman, as well as boobs Mcgee, aka Blake Lively (You explain why she keeps getting work, and if the answer doesn’t include the word ‘boobs’ I’ll shut up). Travolta is going to play Dennis, a burned out DEA agent. Lively will play O, which I assume is because that’s the shape her mouth made while she ‘auditioned’ for the role, and Thurman will play Lively’s mom, Pagu. Pagu. Sounds like a spaghetti sauce. Pagu. I know it’s Prego, but Pagu is close.

Ted

Seth MacFarlane’s Ted, a half live action, half CGI monstrosity, has added Jessica Stroup to the cast. Well, she is attractive. I like that much about her. Of course, when she begins talking to a CGI teddy bear I’m going to hate her guts.

Bourne, Kinda

So the brilliant movie studios have decided to reboot the Jason Bourne series, but instead of calling their new hero Jason Bourne, they’re going to call him… something. The film will be called The Bourne Legacy, but little else is known. I like Renner, but this is like making a new James Bond film and calling the lead something OTHER than James Bond. And he doesn’t get his martini’s shaken, and he isn’t a spy, he just dresses up in suits and bangs hot broads.

Actually, I’d see that film.

Transformers

Transformers: Dark of the Moon, has a new banner poster, to complement yesterday’s Bumblebee poster. This one is of Shockwave. He’s a bad guy. You can tell because he’s not colorful. The bad guys are black. Hmmm… I think that’s sorta racist. Of course, the hip hop twins from the second one were also racist, but not in the same way. That was more insensitive racism. This whole “bad people are black” thing is far more overt. I say we boycott.

Trailers for Rise of the Planet of the Apes and Abduction, a bunch of posters for The Hangover, The Expatriate and Rock of Ages casting, and a video from the set of The Hobbit!

Rise of the Planet of the Apes

I’ve been curious for a while about Rise of the Planet of the Apes, and now that there’s finally a trailer, I can say that the film looks kinda… stupid. Well, James Franco at least looks like a moron. Seriously, does anyone believe that he sounds like a scientist? Oh, right. Stoner scientist. That’s who I would trust with a million (or perhaps billion) dollar experiment. I bet the drug that makes the apes smarter is super weed. But you don’t use it on the apes. You just smoke that shit, and you imagine that they’re super intelligent.

I think this is how 28 Days Later started.

Abduction

Wow, here I thought Abduction was going to make a lot of sense and be a really good movie. I guess I was wrong. You know how EVERY kid in high school thinks he’s out of place? Well, you’ve all been kidnapped. The internet said so. Now start killing people and have underage sex.

The Hangover 2

The Hangover 2 is getting to have too many posters. Instead of saying my normal stuff about how awesome or bad the movie is going to be, I’m just going to respond to the quotes in the posters. 1. No, that’s just what you like to do. 2. How come I don’t get to be in the wolfpack? Huh? Who made you alpha wolf? 3. I tried that line on a girl once. It worked. 4. I tried that line on a girl once also. It worked. 5. I said that to both girls. 6. They said that to me.

I am a GOLDEN GOD!

The Expatriate

I wish this movie was about Hemingway. The Expatriate is a film about an ex-CIA agent who moves to Belgium with his teenaged daughter only to get involved with some corporate espionage. Aaron Eckhart is playing the lead, while Liana Liberato will play his daughter. Olga Kurylenko will play another CIA agent who is tracking him down. Sounds good. High five. Apparently the film has been filming already, but it was just announced today that Kurylenko and Liberato have joined the cast. Whew. I was worried before that.

Rock of Ages

Rock of Ages has added Russell Brand to the cast. Clearly, this is the producers just making absolutely sure that I won’t see this epic turd of a film. Well done, producers. Turd of ages.

The Hobbit

Since The Hobbit has now commenced filming, Peter Jackson has decided to inundate us with information and footage from the film. Unfortunately, he’s doing so through Facebook, which I apparently cannot embed. I could ‘like’ it, but I decided that my friends don’t deserve to see it. Cause they’re jerks. So I’m just going to link to it here. Be warned, it’s long.

Yet another line I’ve used on a lady.

It worked.

A trailer for Midnight in Paris, a pic of Johnny Depp in Hugo Cabret, some X-Men pics from Empire, a new Harry Potter poster, and some pics from Warrior.

Midnight in Paris

Midnight in Paris is Woody Allen’s next movie, about a young American couple who visit Paris and discover some of the wonders about the city. Or, that’s what I THOUGHT it was about. Now I think it’s about Owen Wilson either going nuts or cheating on his wife. Or both. Anyways, here’s the new trailer for the film, which has officially bumped my excitement level from a 2 all the way up to an 8. Out of a hundred.

Hugo Cabret

Hugo Cabret is Martin Scorcese’s first 3D pic, and it’s a bit of a kid’s film, but since it’s Scorcese, it’ll probably be good. From the picture I can tell that Johnny Depp plays an artist/child molester who just had his way with those two kids. I may also be reading into painful memories from my childhood. Wouldn’t it be weird if I was reading into memories of YOUR childhood? Also, weird is on of the few words that does NOT follow the “i before e except after c’ rule. Weird.

X-Men

X-Men: First Class is only a few short months away, and Empire magazine has all the latest deets. Deets are details, but in shorthand. I wonder if I should use shorthand, then explain the shorthand, then write rambling sentences about shorthand. It sorta defeats the purpose of shorthand.

Anyways, these photos from Empire magazine are from Obsessed with Film. It’s rare that I so blatantly take photos from another site, but since they scanned them, they get credit. One thing to note is how awesome January Jones’ rack looks. In the movie she can turn into diamond. Guess which part of me just turned hard as a diamond?

My peep. Peep is shorthand for… never mind.

Harry Potter

Harry Potter is almost at an end. I haven’t read the book, so don’t ruin it for me, but my guess is that Voldemort wins. Here’s a poster. It apparently all ends here.

Warrior

Warrior, the latest attempt by Hollywood to cash in on this MMA craze sweeping the nation, has two new photos out, showcasing the amazing acting skills of Tom Hardy. I wonder if the filmmakers know that UFC refs don’t wear bow ties?

Quite a bit of news over the weekend, including a possible James Franco project, Jodie Foster casting, and Pirates of the Caribbean stuff.

Pirates of the Caribbean

Let’s be honest, Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is likely going to be the biggest film I’m talking about in this post. So let’s start there. There’s a new behind the scenes video, and the cover for the upcoming Empire magazine featuring Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow has found it’s way online, and into your hearts. That’s right, I can see into your hearts.

Elysium

District 9 director Neil Blomkamp’s next film, Elysium, which has already cast Sharlto Copley and Matt Damon, has also hired Jodie Foster, who I contend is a super hot older lesbian. At least, I’ve heard she’s a muffin muncher. No judgements. She seems like a nice, classy lady. Who made a film called The Beaver just because she is infatuated. Like me.

Blood Meridian

James Franco, who I suspect is crazy essentially everyday, is apparently in talks to write and direct the film. No word if he wants to have a part in the film, but I’d guess yes. Franco is getting a serious leg up with all his attention for 127 Hours. He’s been reported to be in talks to replace Matt Damon in the Bourne series, and now he wants to direct stuff. Rock on, brother.

Captain America

Talk about a teaser. ET is going behind the scenes on next summer’s Captain America: The First Avenger, and they have a full SIX SECONDS of it online. And I knew you’d all want to see it.

There’s also this pic, which is kinda cool.

In Beginners, a young man learns two shocking facts about his father: he’s dieing, and he has a gay lover. Man, that takes me back. I was five, and my dad introduced me to Larry. I got sooooo many presents that year. Mom seemed sad.

Just kidding. Mom wasn’t sad.

Anyways, Beginners takes place over the course of a few months before the death of Hal, who is main character Oliver’s father, and a period of time afterward, as Oliver considers back over his life. It seems that he relives many of the moments of his life, in flashback, reconsidering them in the context that his father was always gay but pretending to be straight and happy.

Oliver is a serial monogamist, and seems to have little to do with women on an emotional level, which may be because of the strangeness of his parent’s relationship.

The Scoop

The story is said to be a fictionalized account of a part of director Mike Mills’ life. Mills wrote and directed the film. Most of you will know Mills from his last major work, Thumbsucker. I wonder if his dad is happy or rolling in his grave because his son has outed him postmortem.

Trailer

Who’s It For?

No rating yet.

Pictures

Movie Release Date

June 3, 2011.

Who’s In It?

Ewan McGregor … Oliver
  Christopher Plummer … Hal
  Mélanie Laurent … Anna
  Goran Visnjic … Andy
  Bill Oberst Jr. … Movie night guest -Hal’s friend
  Mary Page Keller … Georgia
  Jodi Long … Dr. Flaster
  China Shavers … Shauna
  Kai Lennox … Elliot

Related Movies

Thumbsucker, I Love You Phillip Morris, Elizabethtown

What’s Good About It?

Ewan McGregor and Christopher Plummer rock. Even with the crap Star Wars prequels.

What’s Bad About It?

I worry it may not be gay enough.

Our Clever Prediction

I don’t see Beginners as a big box office type of film, but it looks good enough that it should make some decent money, and get some good critical praise.

Luke Cage tells the story of a wrongly imprisoned man who develops superpowers, namely unbreakable skin and super strength, escapes prison, and becomes a hero for hire.

Director John Singleton has long been attached to the project, with Tyrese Gibson potentially playing the lead, but recent news indicated that Marvel is planning a handful of 10 minute mini movies that would play before their main films like Thor and Captain America. Dr. Strange and Luke Cage were both mentioned in conjunction with these mini movies, with the purpose being to generate interest as well as educate the public on some of the lesser known heroes in Marvel comics.

Who’s It For?

Luke Cage is one of the heroes who would be better with an R rating, like Blade, but it’s Marvel, and PG-13 sells better.

Movie Release Date

If it’s a movie short, expect it next summer before Thor or Captain America.

Who’s In It?

Tyrese Gibson and the Rock have both been suggested, as well as Jason Statham, who would be the most hilarious choice since there are very few African-American comic book heroes, and he would take one away.

Related Movies

Ghost Rider, Blade, Shaft, Thor, Captain America, Iron Man, The Avengers.

What’s Good About It?

Luke Cage has become much more prominent in recent years, in fact, the latest issue of The New Avengers has him leading his own team. Not bad for a former hero for hire. Could be cool.

What’s Bad About It?

Luke Cage is little known for a reason, he isn’t very interesting. The audience for most comic books is predominantly white males, and Cage doesn’t appeal to them in the same way that Peter Parker does. Fans like characters that reflect them, not ones whose ridiculously oversized junk makes theirs look pathetic. Not talking about me there. I’m talking about you. (I’m pointing at the screen*)

Our Clever Prediction

Expect the mini movie to be made, receive lots of hype before it’s seen by the general public, receive a response of “ehh…” and then the film doesn’t get made. But you never know. Maybe they’ll have mini movie sequels.

*Not with my junk

DragonMan and the Poseidon Encounter follows the story of Luke Starr, aka Dragonman, a seemingly normal teenaged boy who secretly weilds massive powers and is destined to save the far-off planet of Spellville.

The book series is written by Ted Lazaris, whose own name is better than that of his hero. The Poseidon Encounter is actually the second book of his series, following Dragonman: The Adventures of Luke Starr. The story is very similar to that of Spider-man, with the hero having to juggle regular high school life with that of his super-hero alter ego. Unlike Spider-man, this guy’s name is Dragonman, which sounds ridiculous.

Who’s It For?

Kid’s movie, PG at most.

Movie Release Date

Movie is still in the script revision stage, with no director attached. Late 2011 at earliest, but 2012 is more likely.

Who’s In It?

No casting yet.

Related Movies

Spider-man, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Harry Potter.

What’s Good About It?

This type of story has made for some hugely successful films (see above), and while Dragonman may skew a little younger, it could still make two or three boatloads of money.

What’s Bad About It?

It’s called Dragonman. I came up with better names on the back of my 8th Grade math notebooks.

Our Clever Prediction

The rights to the books were probably bought just in case the book series took off and became the next Twilight. In today’s film climate, with Twilight, Harry Potter, and a whole slew of other films trying to capitalize on the same success, any book that’s halfway decent is going to be bought right away. Who knows? Maybe with a big enough budget and a good director it could turn into the next Harry Potter.