So I was conned into going to see The Smurf Movie yesterday by my 6yr olds. I say ‘conned’ because I have been the victim of terrible kids movies this year. The Smurf Movie gave me hope again that hollywood can do things right, as this kids movie demonstrated.

The Truth

The Smurfs (Our full preview, images and Trailer) was a really simple plot, which everyone appreciated. When the evil wizard Gargamel chases the tiny blue Smurfs out of their village, they tumble from their magical world and into ours. Simple enough, right? They give those of us new to the Smurfs a basic background etc, and voila the movie is underway. I love it. Writers that actually get us into the move quickly, no uninteresting side-plots etc, just the facts.

Neil Patrick Harris is the unlikely recipient of the Smurfs (lets just call himi NPH from now on) and his loving wife (played by Jayma Mays ) are the perfect fit. Great chemistry between the couple, and the animated smurfs made me forget NPH had a different orientation towards women in real life. Thats a compliment BTW.

Hank Azaria is awesome as Gargamel, his animated comedy is brilliant and brings the cumbersome, but still somewhat loveable wizard to life. We all enjoyed the style the wrote for Gargamel, and his trusty cat. The two have a love/hate relationship that is wonderful till the very final scene.

The story moves along with no downtime or depressing sideplots (take note Disney, as Cars 2 was a disaster for half the movie) and laughter galore. We loved the fact there was nothing inappropriate for young kids, no bad language or sexual content.

The Laughs

The Smurfs was hilarious for all, parents will have a great time. While we admit there was too much ‘clumsy smurf’ , the writers made enough jokes about the entire Smurf culture and environment to please us all.

Why should I watch it?

The Smurfs is a great family movie with positive values and moments. Lots of laughter and moments will probably make this your favorite kid movie of the summer.

What’s Good About It?

The laughs and story.

What’s bad about it?

Maybe just a little too much focus on clumsy Smurf, it reminded us of Cars 2 havingi too much Mater.

What I learned

Hollywood can get it right once in a ‘blue moon’. (You’ll get this after you see the movie)

The Verdict

Ok, I admit it , a couple moments in the movie brought out my sensitive side. The Smurfs is by far the best children’s movie of the summer, probably the best I have seen in the last 2 years. Well done Smurfs!

Not to be confused with the hit Eddie Money Song, Take Me Home Tonight is another throwback to the 80′s in this 2011 comedy.

The Truth

In Take Me Home Tonight , the summer of 1988 winds down as three friends on the verge of adulthood attend an out-of-control party in celebration of their last night of unbridled youth.

Recent MIT grad Matt Franklin (Topher Grace) should be working for a Fortune 500 company and starting his upward climb to full-fledged yuppie-hood. Instead, the directionless 23-year-old confounds family and friends by taking a part-time job behind the counter of a video store at the Sherman Oaks Galleria.

But Matt’s silent protest against maturity comes to a screeching halt once his unrequited high school crush, Tori Frederking (Teresa Palmer), walks into the store. When she invites him to an epic, end-of-summer party, Matt thinks he finally might have a chance with the girl of his dreams. With his cynical twin sister Wendy (Anna Faris) and best friend Barry (Dan Fogler), Matt embarks on a once-in-a-lifetime evening. From stealing a car to a marriage proposal to an indescribable, no-holds-barred dance-off, these friends share experiences that will change the course of their lives on one unforgettable night in the Go-Go ’80s.

The Laughs

Take Me Home Tonight was surprisingly, hilarious and an underrated movie to be sure. It was a wonderful tribute to every 80′s movie I ever loved as a kid, and had a ton of laughter speak of.

Why should I watch it?

Because the film is really a hidden gem that finally did the 80′s right and Teresa Palmer is stunning as the sexy blonde female lead.

What’s Good About It?

Topher Grace and Teresa Palmer have wonderful chemistry, and the laughs are really dead on for the 80′s. The film doesn’t treat you like an idiot, the entire film works from start to finish.

What’s bad about it?

Nothing at all.

What I learned

I miss the 80′s. I miss the parties, the people, and the music. I’m getting old.

The Verdict

Take Me Home Tonight flew under the radar, but it was perhaps one of the better comedies I have seen this year, without question.

Great job!

Kill the Irishman was offered to our crack team of DVD reviewers, and its one of the rare instances where it was a good experience for us all.

Over the summer of 1976, 36 bombs detonate in the heart of Cleveland while a turf war raged between Irish mobster Danny Greene (Ray Stevenson) and the Italian mafia. Kill The Irishman chronicles Greene’s heroic rise from a tough Cleveland neighborhood to become an enforcer in the local mob. Turning the tables on loan shark Shondor Birns (Christopher Walken) and allying himself with gangster John Nardi (Vincent D’Onofrio), Greene stops taking orders from the Mafia and pursues his own power. Surviving countless assassination attempts from the mob and killing off anyone who went after him in retaliation, Danny Greene’s infamous invincibility and notorious fearlessness eventually led to the collapse of mafia syndicates across the U.S. and also earned him the status of the man the mob couldn’t kill.

The Truth

Kill the Irishman is based on the true story of Danny Greene, a tough Irish thug working for mobsters in Cleveland. Cleveland? Yes, Cleveland. Walken and Stevenson are wickedly clever in their portrayals of the badass main leads, and surprise surprise, Val Kilmer is finally given a role he can perform in. The raw news footage thrown into the movie only adds to the era, and gives you a feel of the real terror that was happening back in 76.

Why should I watch it?

Kill The Irishman is a biopic, and a true story.

What’s Good About It?

Wonderful acting, and the cinematography is exceptional. They recreated the 70s perfectly.

What I learned

Cleveland was, and always will be a dump.

The Verdict

Kill the Irishman is a great little flick, check it out. The Kill The Irishman Blu-ray™ and DVD bonus features include the hour-long documentary, “Danny Greene: The Rise And Fall Of The Irishman,” featuring never-before-seen crime scene footage; interviews with the FBI agents and mobsters who worked with Danny Greene; as well as interviews with his family and friends.

So I was dragged to the theaters this weekend to watch the sequel to Doc Hollywood , I mean Cars. My initial excitement (ya right) was immediately squashed when the most irritating character since Jar Jar Binks arrived on screen, Mater.

Cars 2 Review

They really could have called the film, ‘Mater 2′, because there was nothing more to the film than Mater. Mater gets into problems, Mater saves the day, Mater gives us stupid one-liners over and over again until you just want to yell at the screen ‘Shut the F Up Mater!’. So , in some really confusing plot that kids are supposed to get involved in, Mater has to save the day, because that’s apparently the hidden message here. Give your dumbest friends a chance, and they will make it up to you. Sorry, it doesn’t work that way. My dumbest friends aren’t saving the day, they aren’t doing anything worthwhile.

Pixar managed to find a way to take an enlightening, although unoriginal, story and make it into the dark, kid movie with a environmental undertone. I think. It was something like that. The writers minimized the roles of the less irritating characters like Sally, and gave us more irritation than a Lindsay Lohan’s bikini bottoms. Get it? Because she’s like, a dirty party girl and her bikini bottoms would be rubbing that.. Bam! You like that one? I got more, but I’ll save them for later, I’m crazy like that.

Michael Cane doesn’t shut up, not ever, unfortunately. But wait, what about the 3d? What 3D? Nothing terrific here, I forgot I was even in a 3D movie for most of the 1 HR and 52 MINUTES of pain I had to endure for Cars 2. Most of the kids were just staring around the theater, wondering.. when will this god awful movie just end? I’ll tell you where it end, it ends with Mater once again being shoved in your face, being the hero. McQueen learns a lesson about friendship as well. Apparently you just let your idiot friends run around being inappropriate and consider yourself lucky to have them in your life. Teach this to your kids, let me know how it works out for you in 15 years.

We waited this many years for this forgetful piece of garbage?

The Laughs

The writers put a ‘mother’ and a ‘sister’ joke within the first 5 minutes of the movie, it failed miserably. Shocking right? Putting a joke about having sex with your mother, or sister, in a movie aimed at 7 – 10 yr olds. So before you complain about how our site and movie coverage is disgusting, start complaining to the studios. The entire theatre was full of people looking around, wondering when something interesting was going to happen. Unless you found the stupid tow truck funny, then I guess you loved this movie, right? If you are over the age of 14 and found Mater funny, I’m going to find you and punch your lights out, male or female.. its go time. Want a piece of me? Bring it!

Why should I watch it?

I’m not saying, don’t watch it.. just wait for the DVD.

What’s Good Cars 2

There was about 30 seconds in the racing moments in Italy, where the 3D was going to get really good, then it just sucked. Its like they know how to trick me.

What’s bad about Cars 2

Confusing plot, not enough 3D to make it worthwhile, and TOO MUCH MATER FOR ANY ONE PERSON WHO IS SANE. Mater and Jar Jar Binks, the two most irritating creations of all time.

What I learned

There won’t be a Cars 3, Cars 2 jumped the shark.

The Verdict

Cars 2 left me speechless, rent it at the most…

Every so often a film comes along which is marketed and advertised to death, applauded by the public and awarded by the industry and continues to play at your local cinema just waiting for you to watch it.

After finally watching Black Swan it occurred to me that all the praise lavished upon it is deserved. It is a unique and dark tale, perfectly acted with a distinctive visual style. But unfortunately that’s all it is.

The Truth

Nina Sayers (Natalie Portman) is a fragile but talented ballet dancer whose complete immersion in her profession has left her seemingly unable to function out in the big bad world. Pursuing the ever destructive ideal of ‘perfection’, Nina is forced to pirouette out of her comfort zone of dancing the white swan and embrace the role of her evil twin the black swan, unleashing her own wickedness as she does so.

Helped on her way to deviance by the sexual advances of both her mentor Tomas (Vincent Cassell) and doppelganger rival Lily (Mila Kunis), Nina finds her black swan but confines it within her own mind ultimately succeeding in hurting no one but herself. Or does she? In his portrait of Nina, so close you can see the camera’s reflection in her eyeball, director Darren Aronofsky creates a visual representation of a mind losing its grip on reality allowing fantasy, horror and paranoia to command the action. Looking for plausibility and consequence will only disappoint as the claustrophobic and frantic atmosphere of losing control takes over.

What’s Good About Black Swan?

Preconceptions of extreme horror or sexual explicitness are in the most part unfounded. Scenes demonstrating Nina’s self-harm are brilliantly done as her evil reflection takes over and attacks of cutting and scratching are done to her not by her. Be warned though, the most shocking and frightening act of violence involves faded prima ballerina Beth (Winona Ryder) and a nail file.

It’s refreshing that it’s not Tomas the demanding and predatory mentor who gives Nina her first sexual experience but fellow dancer and arch-nemesis Lily. Although racy enough, the sex scenes in the Black Swan aren’t a glamorous, air-brushed attempt to lure porn-starved adolescents into the cinema. In fact the most uncomfortable part of the sex scenes, in particular the masturbation scene, is not that you’re watching Natalie Portman going solo. The fact that it takes place in her bedroom, surrounded by child-like memorabilia of a ballerina princess brings the unresolved contradiction between Nina as infantilised ballerina princess and Nina as a woman to the foreground.

What’s Bad About Black Swan?

In an attempt to intensify the sense of panic and fear felt by Nina, Black Swan resorts to almost cliché horror conventions and uses Scream-esque effects which add nothing to the atmosphere except a cheap thrill. Even the integral effects of Nina’s doppelganger sightings and independent and threatening reflection become overused by the end and leave a sense that something’s missing from her rapid demise into insanity.

What I Learned

Ballerinas are nuts, as are their mothers. Also never, ever pull on a hang-nail.

The Verdict

A victim of extremely high expectations as an intentional sister piece to The Wrestler (2008), Black Swan left me slightly disappointed. The intense emotional investment needed to understand Randy’s (Mickey Rourke) self-destructive behaviour and the painful disappointment of those around him is absent from Black Swan making the viewing experience a slightly numbing spectator event. The imaginative and at times surreal beauty of the cinematography as well as the shock-value of violent and sexual scenes goes some way to remedy this but unfortunately, for me, it doesn’t go quite far enough.

Everyone’s favourite cyber-goth Lisbeth Salander is back as The Girl who Played with Fire is released on DVD. Moving on from tattoo related deviance, this time the little scamp has been into arson.

The Truth

The Girl Who Played with Fire picks up where its predecessor The Girl with a Dragon Tattoo left off precisely one year on. The movie begins with Lisbeth’s (Noomi Rapace) hasty departure from her luxurious beach-front exile as she returns to Sweden to drop in on her legal guardian Bjurman. It seems having a tattoo stating ‘I’m a sadistic rapist pig’ across your torso can cause some problems on the dating scene.

While Lisbeth is back in her motherland a recent recruit to Millenium magazine’s team of journalists and his criminologist girlfriend are found dead. Mikael Blomkvist (Michael Nyqvist) is dragged deep into a sex-trafficking scandal affecting Sweden’s most senior figures in a quest to hold those responsible for their murders to account. That all sounds straight-forward enough yet once Lisbeth is accused of the murders and a nationwide manhunt ensues it all gets a bit confusing as to who has framed her, how they did it, when and why.

What’s Good About The Girl Who Played With Fire?

Again the plot is satisfying in its gritty yet (slightly) classier take on the generic thriller where action is driven by amateur detectives, who in their search for a murderer uncover scandalous political and bureaucratic corruption. Lisbeth becomes increasingly fascinating as details about her disturbing past and the horrendous people she shares DNA with come to light. Underestimated by all but Mikael, Lisbeth picks up where she left off in her quest for vengeance against those who abused her only now Mikael has to clear her name in the process. All good (and violently disturbed) things come in small packages and a police officer who makes light of Lisbeth’s status as a dangerous criminal based on her tiny stature is really asking for it. Cleverly utilizing some new tricks and toys, (where did she get a taser?!) Lisbeth continues to unleash her vengeful wrath on any man who deserves it.

What’s Bad About The Girl Who Played With Fire?

The fast pacing and jumps in narrative are at times hard to follow and point to a tightly-compressed adaptation from novel to film. The attempt to squeeze a bit too much in leaves The Girl who Played with Fire lacking in more reflective moments, lurching as it does from one scene of action to another. Lisbeth and Mikael come into contact only once in the movie by which time Lisbeth is at deaths door resulting in a less than illuminating exchange. The burgeoning relationship between Lisbeth and Mikael is portrayed beautifully in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo as they struggle to accept what they mean to each other, as sexual attraction and trusting friendship develop seemingly against their wills. Completely missing from this film, I can only hope the friction and chemistry between them is recaptured in the third instalment.

What I Learned

It seems since the days of Sherlock Holmes, the amateur detective will always do better than the actual police force. Both Mikael and Lisbeth are smarter, tougher and more capable than any detective in Sweden. They should really think about getting these people on the payroll.

The Verdict

Enjoyable overall, the second installment in the Steig Larsson trilogy is a necessary filling in ‘The Girl’ movie sandwich. Although treading familiar ground plot-wise, this movie maintains credibility in its ability to portray a world which seems to belong to and revolve around Lisbeth, even as it incessantly attempts to victimise her. As her ice-cold serving of vengeance steps up a notch you’re left restlessly waiting to see the third movie and find out how it all ends.

Ultramarines A Warhammer 40,000 movie is an animated film based in the universe of the role playing game Warhammer. An elite fighting force called the Ultramarines travels to a distant planet to discover what happened to a group of their people who sent out a distress signal.

The Truth

First, I have to admit that I have never played Warhammer, and actually thought it was a videogame before I looked it up on Wikipedia. As far as I can tell, it’s essentially a version of Dungeons and Dragons, with turn-based gameplay and dice rolling for victory. My lack of knowledge of the game no doubt lessened my enjoyment of the film, as I had absolutely no idea of what the universe was all about, the motivations of the heroes, or just about anything else. The visual style of the film, especially the way the Ultramarines looked, is taken from the board game, and I’m sure that seeing these characters come to life must be pretty cool for fans, but a lot of it was lost on me.

As far as I know, the characters in the film were invented for the film. I think the game has characters in various classes, but I don’t think they were ever given personalities, so each character was invented for the film, but each also participated in their class, with the respective abilities that you might expect from them. This adds to the film, as there is some depth to the world, where different guys seem to be naturally good at some things, but there was a lack of exposition throughout the film, so I had no idea beforehand what to expect, and I didn’t know why some stuff should be cool.

The story is very one dimensional, as really a single, long battle is the entire film. There is no love story, political maneuvering, or other element that would make you really care about the characters. The impression is that you should care because of the world, but the heroes are very consistent about their love for ‘The Emperor’ and I have no idea who he is (besides an emperor) and why I should care. They seem to have honor, but the society they take part in is not one that is consistent with the modern world. You could almost look at the Ultramarines as Nazis, bred for war and fighting, with little else in their lives. It kinda reminds me of Starship Troopers (the book, not the shit movie) but at least Heinlein developed the world and explained how things got to that futuristic society. No doubt there is some fiction out there that has developed the Warhammer world, but it isn’t in the movie at all. If you’re not a fan, you’ll be lost.

The Laughs

None that I can remember, the film is pretty action heavy, with no breaks for humor.

What’s Good About Ultramarines?

Visually, it’s pretty cool. It reminds me of that Final Fantasy film that came out about ten years ago, but it isn’t as pretty. For a story and a world that I don’t care about, it was good that the film was all action, and reasonably cool action at that. There are a handful of slow motion bullet following shots, which as cliched as hell, but it still made the action sequences work. The final fight scene with (spoiler) some sort of demon was also kinda badass, with a couple Ultramarines getting their asses kicked before the hero picks up the Warhammer, in a King Arthur pulling the sword from the stone moment, and bashing the demon’s knees before killing it.

What’s Bad About Ultramarines?

While I like the visual style, with it’s computerized animation and stylized action, there are video games that have better graphics. There was more visual detail in the last God of War game than in Ultramarines, and those were in-game graphics. Not just cut scenes. A preview video for the recently released DC Universe was also cooler and looked better. For a film that is essentially one big fight scene, it’s been overshadowed by at least a dozen video game promotional videos in the last six months. The story will be lost on 99% of you, unless you’re a fan of the game, who I assume are the only ones who are going to see it anyways.

What I Learned

In a world with soldiers fighting on distant planets with guns and carrying banners that catch fire when demons are near, the best weapon is still a big ass hammer. Thor is going to kick all kinds of ass.

The Verdict

Ultimately, Ultramarines is not for everyone. If you’re a fan of the game, or have at least either played it once or twice or know enough of the background of the game, then I suggest watching Ultramarines. If you’ve never heard of the game, or are like me and have almost no idea what it’s about, then it’s a tough sell. I’ll say that if you’re a fan of anime and what to watch 70 minutes of a fight scene, then you could do worse. It isn’t long, which is a saving grace for the movie, so you can enjoy it without feeling like you wasted your time. Admittedly, if it was 2 hours long I would be severely negative, but as it stands it was a reasonably entertaining film. It felt a bit like an episode of a series, with all the setting and characters development in previous episodes, but it was decent enough. If you’re a fan, then I’d give it a 16 out of 17.4 stars. If you’re not a fan, then I’ll give it 10 out of 17.4 stars.

Blue Valentine is a melancholy love story starring Michelle Williams and Ryan Gosling as a married couple struggling to save their marriage. Sounds like fun… No?

The Truth

You’d be forgiven for thinking this is another ‘relationship’ movie whose main objective appears to be convincing us that falling in love is merely a precursor to the eventual kick in the teeth you will receive when it all falls apart.
Fortunately Blue Valentine is so perfectly balanced in tone it avoids the pitfalls of the self-obsessed break-up film. There are moments in Blue Valentine which reaffirm your faith in the world as a beautiful place full of amazing people, one of whom could be your soul mate but there are also moments which remind you how gut-wrenchingly painful it is to love and lose.

The Laughs

Although Blue Valentine clearly isn’t a laugh out loud movie, it does have lighter moments which really make you smile. The tap-dancing scene is just gorgeous.

What’s Good About Blue Valentine?

Switching between the early days in Cindy and Dean’s relationship and their current dysfunctional marriage, Blue Valentine manages to create a genuine and honest love story for our time which represents aging, marriage and disappointment with such truth it almost feels like a documentary.

The subtle aging of the couple shows the dedication of writer and director Derek Cianfrance to create something painfully realistic. As she ages Cindy gets slightly heavier, her eyes look puffy and tired and we rarely see that perfect smile which makes her so radiant. As Dean ages his hair thins, he drinks before breakfast and replaces his leather biker jacket (symbol of youth in revolt) with the ugliest jumper I’ve ever seen.

What’s Bad About Blue Valentine?

I can’t say a bad thing about this movie. I like it more every day.

What I Learned

Nothing lasts forever so enjoy it while you can. That’s kind of deep for a Thursday afternoon. I’ll stick with keep your hair long because it makes you look younger and never wear a jumper with an eagle on the front.

The Verdict

Blue Valentine will stay with you for days. I guarantee it. If you’re particularly sensitive it will be on your mind for weeks. If you’re on Prozac or Valium it will be months, maybe even years before you can shake the bitter sweet emotional drain of this movie.

Blue Valentine is a warning for the lovers, a reminder for the already heartbroken and for those who are yet to fall in love – you just won’t get it.

Sometimes festive spirit would be a whole lot easier to achieve with copious amounts of actual spirits. I can certainly get into some carol singing after half a pint of vodka but maintaining ‘christmas cheer’ without any mind-altering chemicals can get a little testing after the first month or so.

So, when the food is giving you indigestion and the twinkling lights have induced a migraine. When the sugar-high kids are sledging down the stairs. When the sight of Richard Attenborough in a Santa costume stops making you feel warm inside and starts making you feel violent, it’s time to indulge your Scroogey side with one of my top three alternative Christmas movies.

The Nightmare Before Christmas

A classic animation produced by Tim Burton, The Nightmare Before Christmas is a mash-up of a light-hearted Halloween movie and a warped Christmas one. When Jack Skellington of Halloween Town becomes enthralled with his new discovery, Christmas Town, it becomes clear he doesn’t quite understand the meaning of the season of goodwill. As the local people of Halloween Town begin to imitate Christmas traditions it all gets a bit disturbing. Wonderfully imaginative and full of excellent tunes I’m not ashamed to say I think The Nightmare Before Christmas is kind of scary too. Well, for kids anyway…

Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale

This new release from Finland dares to go where no Christmas movie has gone before. Forgetting the pleasantries, Rare Exports doesn’t bother planting the idea that Santa could be a sinister character. Instead Santa is revealed to be a living breathing incarnation of Satan. A giant horned monster dug out from an ice-filled mountain he must be stopped from carrying out the cold-blooded murder of local children. Fantastically macabre with great twisted humour this little gem will make you pleased Satan isn’t real, erm I mean Santa. Same letters. Co-incidence?

Bad Santa

My favourite Christmas movie, Bad Santa reminds us that crime, alcohol and depravity still reign during the festive period. Bad Santa and his Bad Elf rob the Department Stores that hire them every year at Christmas. On the run Willie (Santa) moves in with a strange child with a penchant for Sandwich-making and his demented grandma. Just make sure you don’t watch this movie with your grandma. As Willie says, “I’m an eating, drinking, shitting, fucking Santy Claus.” If that doesn’t get you in the festive spirit nothing will.

Encased in ice deep in the Korvatunturi Mountains is an evil monster, an immortal beast that thrives on the mass murder of children. This is no werewolf, no vampire, no alien life form. This is Santa Claus…

The Truth

Refreshingly we’re thrust straight into the action in this Finnish curiosity from director Jalmari Helander. Following a large scale excavation under the guise of seismic testing, strange things begin to happen to the inhabitants of a tiny mountain village. After their whole herd of Reindeer are found torn apart, father and son, Rauno (Jorma Tommila) and Pietari (Onni Tommila) find the body of a naked and rancid old man impaled in their wolf trap. No-one listens to Pietari’s terrified warning; the coca-cola Santa is just a hoax – the real Santa Claus tears naughty kids to pieces. Next all the potato sacks in the whole village go missing. Pretty soon none of the children can be found.

The Laughs

Rare Exports balances it’s moments of horror and gore with a deliciously dark humour. Rauno enlists the help of Pietari and two fellow villagers to take the vile creature hostage, planning to sell it to the Americans. After biting off one of their ears it becomes clear he must be restrained and so is wrapped in plastic and hung from the ceiling by meat hooks. Taking a well deserved rest the team sit together and eat home-made gingerbread. The whole story is so fantastically absurd and demented there is nothing else to do but laugh.

What’s Good About Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale?

This movie is Home Alone, Scandinavian-style. Instead of Kevin McCallister we have Pietari, complete with Christmas jumpers and the obligatory bobble hat he is quietly charismatic without the face slapping and knee skids. This is my provincial Finnish village. I have to defend it.

What’s Bad About Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale?

Unfortunately there is some pretty dodgy CGI during the last sequence, no doubt a result of a very tight budget. It’s a shame but doesn’t spoil the overall effect. The only really bad thing about this movie is its limited release in the UK and the US making it quite difficult to get hold of.

What I Learned

I wasn’t a morbid child after all. I was right to be terrified at the thought of an old man repeatedly breaking into my home in the middle of the night – even if he did bring presents.

The Verdict

Refreshingly imaginative with that twisted humour the Nordics do so well, Rare Exports is a rare treat amongst the usual barrage of sickly festive crap. Although probably one to watch without the kids, this movie does have a wonderful feel-good ending and despite all the Satanic Santa stuff left me feeling full of timely festive spirit.