Arthur is a remake of the 1981 original film, about a playboy billionaire whose family wants him to marry an heiress, though he falls for a working class girl. He must choose between his love or his money.
The original starred Dudley Moore. This new Arthur movie stars Russell Brand. I’m angry about this. Why should Mr. Katy Perry be allowed to star in films? I liked him okay in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, but he’s an ass. I don’t want to see this. I suppose this should have gone in the section about what’s Bad about it, but I’m starting with it, cause this angers me.
Anyways, Russell Brand is the half retarded rich boy. His parents wish for him to marry Jennifer Garner, who is a rich heiress, but he falls for Linda, who is poor and Arthur’s parents don’t like her. They give him an ultimatum: either marry the heiress or lose his billion dollar inheritance. I’d marry Jennifer Garner. She’s hotter.
The New Arthur Movie
This Arthur remake/sign of the apocalypse has been directed by Jason Winer. Winer has NO theatrical directing experience, but he is a producer on Modern Family and has directed a handful of episodes. So that’s… good? Meh.
The biggest question for me is will the also remake the original theme song from the 1981 Arthur movie, ‘Best That You Can Do’? The older crowd here remembers this Burt Bacharach song, right?
When you get caught between the Moon and New York City
I know it’s crazy, but it’s true
If you get caught between the Moon and New York City
The best that you can do …..
The best that you can do is fall in love
Who’s It For?
Children of billionaires who wish to know how to follow their heart. I’m looking at you, Paris.
I love how in the first picture it looks like he’s scratching his chest, but he’s wearing a Batman suit, so there’s no WAY he could feel that under there. It’s BULLETPROOF, stupid.
Movie Release Date
Arthur hits theaters April 8, 2011.
Who’s In It?
Russell Brand … Arthur Bach
Jennifer Garner … Susan Johnson
Helen Mirren … Hobson
Greta Gerwig … Linda Marolla
Nick Nolte … Burt Johnson
Geraldine James … Vivienne Bach
Leslie Hendrix … Alice Johnson
Anya Bergstedt Jordanova … Sleeping Drunk Girl
Christina Calph … Tiffany
Anna Kuchma … Tiffany’s Friend
Jennifer Butler … Dinner Guest
Stink Fisher … Construction Foreman
Alex Ziwak … Casual New Yorker
Original Arthur, Brewster’s Millions, The Toy (I don’t know why I’m referencing Richard Pryor all of a sudden), Billy Madison
What’s Good About It?
The trailer is surprisingly good, given that the film looks so bad.
What’s Bad About It?
Remember that stuff I said earlier? Double that, place a bag of flaming poop on your crotch, stomp on it, and then repeat. Twice.
Our Clever Prediction
It’ll be HUGE. Who doesn’t want to see this?
I doubt it’ll make much money, but you never know. A lot of people saw Sex and the City 2.