The Lone Ranger was a movie that just needed to be done. I mean, they have remade most of the classic Westerns already, so why not one of the most memorable characters besides ‘The Duke’?
The Lone Ranger 2013
The new Lone Ranger movie is still in the early writing stages, but Johnny Depp is signed to play the most loyal Indian in history, Tonto. Kids these days may not know the whole story about The Lone Ranger, so here’s a quick review for todays semi-retarded youth who have never picked up a book :
The Lone Ranger was a survivor of a group of Texas Rangers ambushed by a mean man named Butch Cavendish. He is nursed back to health by Tonto, the Native American who saved him.
The now masked (and somewhat nerdy looking) “Lone Ranger” sets out to bring justice to the West with the help of his friend. Kind of how Clint Eastwood set shit straight in Gran Torino, only its cowboys and Indians this time around.
Who’s The Lone Ranger For?
People older than 40, and fans of the western niche. Have no doubt, Disney will make it super violent and sexual, just to throw at todays youth. Kiss your father’s most beloved childhood hero goodbye, the minds at disney will ruin it, you can count on that.
Lone Ranger Release Date
July 3rd 2013 is the official release date.
Lone Ranger Pics
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- The Lone Ranger 2012
The Lone Ranger Trailers
Who’s In It?
Johnny Depp is in, but wouldn’t it be awesome if Lou Diamond Phillips and Edward James Olmos were too? Arnie Hammer plays The Lone Ranger, and Helena Bonham Carter plays the loose woman who loves liquor and men. Reminds me of my aunt Carol.
Interesting Fact
Clayton Moore played the original Lone Ranger from 1949-1957. He coined the term ‘Indian Giver’ after an on-screen dispute with Tonto.
What’s Good About It?
The Lone Ranger was a pretty cool character when I was young, but so was The Six Million Dollar Man. I guess Depp will bring some legitimacy to this iconic character. Justin Haythe wrote Revolutionary Road, which was a really good story so I have some faith. Also, Jerry Bruckheimer is producing, so.. yeah.. the talent is there.
What’s Bad About It?
Couldn’t they find an actual Indian to play Tonto? Are there no native Americans acting these days? Seriously, Lou Diamond Phillips is looking for work.
Our Clever Prediction
Not sure, I’m not holding my breath for Disney to release anything groundbreaking these days.
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I was recently visiting ‘Old Tucsan’ in AZ and the park tour guide had mentioned Old Tucsan was going to be used for some scenes in this film. They also mentioned a rumor, besides Depp, was that they heard George Clooney was going to be the Lone Ranger. Now, yes, this guy was just a tour guide, but considering he got the Depp part right, and this was just over a year ago, I figured he must know what he’s talking about.
Half Philippino, his other half is Native American.
You are aware that Lou Diamond Phillips is Philippino, right?
Hammer and Depp are perfect for the duo.
If the script follows the classic story, the horses drop on cue, the bad guys get the worst of it, and Hammer and Depp dust off their white hats and keep the sweat out’ta their eyes it should be a good show for all…..
WHO ARE THOSE MASKED MEN OF YESTERYEAR?
Dorman Nelson
Biographer
nothing SHOULD go to anyone in Hollwywood.
Rusty Springfield,