Ruby Sparks is a romantic comedy about a writer with writer’s block who, as an exercise to get him past his block, writes about a girl named Ruby. He falls in love with his creation. She manifests out of thin air and they fall in love.

Okay, that is the idea ever. Here goes: Her name is… Angelina. She has full lips, a perfect rack, is sorta arrogant but has an underlying goodness. She once dated Billy Bob Thornton and will easily chew me up and spit me out. She’s out of my league but supports my dream of weaving a tapestry for the king of Spain.

HOLY SHIT IT CAME TRUE. I QUIT BITCHES. ME AND ANGELINA JOLIE ARE MOVING TO SPAIN.

Sorry… I don’t quit. I’ll need this outlet to track our progress, giving future generations a history of the most important thing to ever happen anywhere. And I’ll be a… hero.

Huh? This is supposed to be about the film Ruby Sparks? But what about my dreams?

FINE. Calvin has some hangups, and his weinie ass is in therapy. His therapist, Elliott Gould, tells him he needs to write one page of ANYTHING. He does. He falls for his creation and she manifests before his eyes, but when he thinks he’s going crazy he finds out other people can see her too.

The best part of the film? The tag line: She’s out of his mind.

THAT’S FREAKING AWESOME. WELL DONE, MARKETING.

Ruby Sparks

Zoe Kazan, who plays Ruby, wrote the screenplay for Ruby Sparks, which will be directed by Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris. They directed Little Miss Sunshine together, so there are worse director teams.

Ruby Sparks Trailer

Ruby Sparks Release Date

July 25, 2012.

Pictures

Who’s In It?

 Deborah Ann Woll
  Antonio Banderas
  Alia Shawkat … Mabel
  Paul Dano … Calvin
  Steve Coogan
  Annette Bening … Gertrude
  Zoe Kazan … Ruby
  Elliott Gould
  Chris Messina
  Aasif Mandvi
  Wallace Langham … Warren
  Toni Trucks … Susie
  Eleanor Seigler … Mandi
  John F. Beach … Adam
  Barrett Perlman … Gym Girl
  Marco Tazioli … Book Club Groupie
  Mark Roman … Literary Fan
  Emma Jacobs … Party-Goer at Langdon’s
  Jane Anne Thomas … Saskia
  Rightor Doyle … Partygoer #1
  Diana Parros … Book Club Member
  Tatiana Sarasty … Book Club Member
  Lindsay Fishkin … Box Office Teller
  Brittany King … Literary fan
  Joshua Wilburn … Drunk at Bar

What’s Good About It?

The trailer is quite charming, I like Paul Dano, and the premise of the film is sweeter than sugar. If Ruby Sparks doesn’t turn too saccharin I think it’ll be pretty darn good.

What’s Bad About It?

I don’t have too many bad things to say. Actually I have no bad things to say about Ruby Sparks.

Our Clever Prediction

I don’t expect Ruby Sparks to be a huge hit, but I do expect it to charm my pants off. I suppose they’ll kick me out of the theater for taking my pants off and they won’t believe me when I say Ruby Sparks did it! COME ON!! I can’t help it if my pants are charmed off!