Freeloaders (2012)

Flying Brian Banana Hammock December 5, 2012 Comments Off

Freeloaders is a new comedy from the producers of Super Troopers and Beerfest, but it’s not directed by the same Broken Lizards guys. Nonetheless, it features their particular brand of humor and is about a bunch of degenerate a**holes (that’s the polite way of saying assholes I think).

Said degenerates are freeloaders (HEY! That’s where the title comes from!) who are feeding off their rock star buddy, Adam Duritz from Counting Crows, who has allowed them to stay and party at his place for quite some time. Duritz, being a total fucking assfuck, is growing up, getting married and buying a place in Manhattan, so he’s going to sell the house. This, of course, screws the freeloaders, who first try to sabotage their friend’s ability to sell the house by messing it up when potential buyers show up, then they decide to try and buy it. Since the place is a mansion, this might prove difficult. So they allow a porn studio to start making films there and other such shenanigans, all the while their friend can’t sell his house cause they’re big jerks.

I totally relate. TO THE ROCK STAR. Cause, after all, isn’t this what Canada is doing? Bunch of freeloaders. What’s that? You have free healthcare? You’re welcome for us protecting you with our military. I’m sure that one mountie riding a goat would really hold off China.

Canada = Freeloaders. Screw them.

Freeloaders

Freeloaders comes from director Dan Rosen, who cowrote the film with Dave Gibbs. This is Gibbs’ first film, and while Rosen has made a few films they weren’t exactly smash hits. On the plus side, Rosen was on one episode of Denise Richards: It’s Complicated.

So there’s that.

Pictures

Freeloaders Trailer

Freeloaders Release Date

On Demand December 11, 2012. In theaters sometime in January.

Who’s In It?

Olivia Munn … Amy
  Jane Seymour
  Nat Faxon … Charlie
  Kevin Sussman … Henry
  Clifton Collins Jr.
  Dave Foley
  Jay Chandrasekhar
  Zoe Boyle
  Garrett Morris … Mr. Abaeze
  Natalie Morales … Red Dot Girl
  Kevin Heffernan
  Wallace Langham … Swedish Car Enthusiast
  Brit Morgan … Samantha
  Gwendoline Yeo … Yue Jie
  Dana Goodman … Delivery Girl Dana
  Courtney Peldon … Amber
  Josh Lawson … Dave
  Anne-Marie Johnson … Lydia
  Steve Lemme … Captain Clam Beard
  Erik Stolhanske … Jolly Roger
  Julia Lea Wolov … Delivery Girl Julia
  Paul Soter … Porn Producer

What’s Good About It?

My favorite part of Freeloaders is that Olivia Munn is in it. Her career hasn’t really gone places. Screw her. She’s only kinda hot.

What’s Bad About It?

Why won’t Olivia Munn respond to my emails, phone calls, sky writing messages and creepy stares as she urinates? I JUST WANT TO UNDERSTAND LOVE.

Our Clever Prediction

As Freeloaders comes out On Demand first then in theaters for what’s likely a limited release, I don’t see it setting box office records.

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